Wednesday, April 26, 2006

apples in the tree

So now I type with one hand... Im learning great lessons in patience! Slowing down and having to accept help from people. I will heal. :-)

My baby boy has gone on school camp today, I'm not sad, I'm not worried, but can easily shed a tear. He will be 9 years old tomorrow, and I wont see him for his birthday at all. Quite strange. To have a 9 year old, makes me feel old, I was OK having an 8 year old, but I think 9 is so much closer to 10. I feel old having a 9 year old son.

I'm going to a funeral today... my god father died, I wasnt close to him, I was close to his wife and sons, I'll cry for them, but no need to cry for him, I'll celebrate his wonderful life. He achieved alot and enojoyed, lived it up. Here's to you Brian aka 'Soapy', cheers

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Celebrate the good in our lives...

I saw the surgeon a couple of days ago, I'm now booked in to have reconstructive surgery on my wrist next Thursday. I'm personally very exited about this. I am in so much pain and discomfort, and have been for 3 months, I can not wait to have something done about it. I want it fixed,I want positive action taken. Yes it'll be a long road, and 6 months more before I have normal use of it again, but they are all steps forward now. I'm tired of the waiting and the pain and possible backwards steps.

But so many people I talk to, are negative about this surgery. some feel sorry for me, sympathy and sorrow (sorry) only takes you down into your pain further. Some say that all surgery is 'bad' and should be advoided at all costs - yes in some cases, maybe, but my wrist NEEDS surgery. I've done the waiting and it aint going to heal itself. They are sorry it will be long recovery. They tell me of all the risks.

But no, what is done is done, accept it and get on with the solution. Sympathy does nothing positive, it doesnt make one feel better, it only dwells on the past (and the negative past at that).

I am happy I've found a surgeon, who understands the problem and can fix it.

So I am flying high after my leap off the cliff, I've now been booked in for surgery... things are getting better. And surgery on the eve of good friday, easter will leave me with a new begining and fresh healing.

Lets celebrate the good in our lives, you achieve nothing by dwelling on the sorrows.

Monday, April 03, 2006

I'm soaring high

I jumped off the cliff, the time was right, the skys were blue, and I soared high. I'm flying higher than I ever imaged that I could. I just had to believe that I could do it and commit, and take that leap of faith.

"Artist: R. Kelly
Song: I Belive I Can Fly Lyrics

I used to think that I could not go on
And life was nothing but an awful song
But now I know the meaning of true love
I'm leaning on the everlasting arms

If I can see it, then I can do it
If I just believe it, there's nothing to it
I believe I can fly
I believe I can touch the sky
I think about it every night and day
Spread my wings and fly away
I believe I can soar
I see me running through that open door
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly
I believe I can fly

See I was on the verge of breaking down
Sometimes silence, it can seem so loud
There are miracles in life I must achieve
But first I know it starts inside of me